My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
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