ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
