Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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