You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
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