The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
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What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
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I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
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