Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Randomize
