You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Randomize
