You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
