Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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