That's intense
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Randomize
