Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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