Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
