there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
he was CRYING into my vagina
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
That accounts for only three of the penises
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Randomize
