I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize