if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
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So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
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I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?