So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
