craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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