He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize