never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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