thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
