...so i touched it.
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
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So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
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That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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