This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize