Texts From Last Night

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  (313): View more from Michigan

  hotel room ftw

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  (313): hotel room ftw http://tfl.nu/h1xu
  Replies (5) Good night (2040) Bad night (727)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.

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  (978): every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y. http://tfl.nu/xtds
  Replies (60) Good night (2816) Bad night (1089)
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other

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  (302): it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other http://tfl.nu/yidf
  Replies (19) Good night (2566) Bad night (851)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".

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  (706): Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe". http://tfl.nu/cnav
  Replies (7) Good night (2569) Bad night (809)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum

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  (412): I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum http://tfl.nu/2gzo
  Replies (6) Good night (3949) Bad night (1171)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.

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  (803): Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing. http://tfl.nu/46mh
  Replies (6) Good night (831) Bad night (2947)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?

  (636): View more from Missouri

  Yup.

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Yup.

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  (314): hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then? (636): Yup. (314): Yup. http://tfl.nu/bp2u
  Replies (71) Good night (25378) Bad night (2068)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?

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  (256): Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background? http://tfl.nu/fohx
  Replies (6) Good night (1192) Bad night (2343)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?

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  (713): Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me? http://tfl.nu/cdq0
  Replies (18) Good night (4066) Bad night (1099)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  "Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.

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  (301): "Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there. http://tfl.nu/ru2o
  Replies (11) Good night (1874) Bad night (561)
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  (940): View more from Texas

  ...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.

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  (940): ...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere. http://tfl.nu/gwb4
  Replies (8) Good night (2414) Bad night (580)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,

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  (309): Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning, http://tfl.nu/hwbb
  Replies (5) Good night (1140) Bad night (919)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.

  (847): View more from Illinois

  i think the last part kind of negates the first part there

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  (773): I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off. (847): i think the last part kind of negates the first part there http://tfl.nu/g7hy
  Replies (3) Good night (1022) Bad night (415)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?

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  (541): How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight? http://tfl.nu/vr15
  Replies (10) Good night (897) Bad night (564)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..

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  (814): My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime.. http://tfl.nu/op0p
  Replies (2) Good night (922) Bad night (303)

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