so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
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