I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize
