PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
