My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Sorry about my life...
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
