A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
