so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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