...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.