I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize