If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
My vagina just recognized that song.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
