I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
