honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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