got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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