Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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