If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
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