And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
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