Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Randomize