I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
