my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
I want her autograph on my taint
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Randomize
