You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
should my penis look like a turkey
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Randomize
