It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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