on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize