That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
