Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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