i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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