That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
i've created a new STD.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
