Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
