we have officially lost it.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
