Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
