thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Randomize
